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Aphorisms Galore! lets you Feed Your Wit by browsing, searching, submitting, discussing, and rating aphorisms and witty sayings by famous and not-so-famous people.

Welcome! The computer thought you might be interested in these aphorisms today, taking into account things like their recent popularities, their ratings, and how new they are to the collection:

Comment#  ·   Fair (433 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

I don't feel good.

Luther Burbank, (dying words), in Life and Death

Comment#  ·   Fair (310 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Less than fifteen percent of the people do any original thinking on any subject... The greatest torture in the world for most people is to think.

Luther Burbank, in Wisdom and Ignorance

Comment#  ·   Fair (364 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Man is able to do what he is unable to imagine. His head trails a wake through the galaxy of the absurd.

René Char, in Success and Failure

Comment#  ·   Fair (1009 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997  · 

When angry, count to ten before you speak; when very angry, a hundred.

Thomas Jefferson, Writings, in Wisdom and Ignorance

Comment#  ·   Fair (935 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997  · 

Life is like a sewer -- what you get out of it depends on what you put into it.

Tom Lehrer, (from the album An Evening Wasted), in Life and Death

An Evening Wasted (audio CD)

Comment#  ·   Fair (1649 ratings)  ·  submitted 1999

Everybody wants to save the earth; nobody wants to help Mom do the dishes.

P. J. O'Rourke, All the Trouble in the World, in Altruism and Cynicism and Work and Recreation

Comment#  ·   Fair (450 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

To know is to know that you know nothing. That is the meaning of true knowledge.

Confucius, in Wisdom and Ignorance

Comment#  ·   Fair (380 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997  · 

I think, therefore I am.

René Descartes, in Science and Religion

Comment#  ·   Fair (276 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

It is people who live by the rules that are always hoping to get them changed.

Robert Harbison, in Law and Politics

Comment#  ·   Fair (279 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Bad policies, stupid policies, gutless policies have real consequences.

Molly Ivins, in Law and Politics

Comment#  ·   Fair (409 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Happiness isn't something you experience; it's something you remember.

Oscar Levant, in Happiness and Misery

Comment#  ·   Fair (499 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Imagination is more important than knowledge.

Albert Einstein, in Science and Religion and Wisdom and Ignorance

Comment#  ·   Fair (473 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997  · 

Comment#  ·   Fair (558 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997  · 

The end of the human race will be that it will eventually die of civilization.

Ralph Waldo Emerson, in War and Peace

Comment#  ·   Fair (420 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Born a saint, die a sinner -- born a sinner, die a saint.

Doug Horton, in Vice and Virtue

Comment#  ·   Fair (563 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

If I don't know I don't know, I think I know. If I don't know I know, I think I don't know.

R. D. Laing, in Wisdom and Ignorance

Comment#  ·   Fair (494 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

You can get more of what you want with a kind word and a gun than you can with just a kind word.

Al Capone, in War and Peace

Comment#  ·   Fair (415 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work.

Thomas Alva Edison, in Success and Failure and Work and Recreation

Comment#  ·   Fair (242 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

I wouldn't mind dying -- it's that business of having to stay dead that scares the shit out of me.

R. Geis, in Life and Death

Comment#  ·   Fair (881 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Luck can't last a lifetime unless you die young.

Russell Banks, in Life and Death and Success and Failure

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