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Aphorisms Galore! lets you Feed Your Wit by browsing, searching, submitting, discussing, and rating aphorisms and witty sayings by famous and not-so-famous people.
Welcome! The computer thought you might be interested in these aphorisms today, taking into account things like their recent popularities, their ratings, and how new they are to the collection:
tiny.ag/o5og0ube · ★★☆☆ Fair (692 ratings) · submitted 1997
A diet is when you watch what you eat and wish you could eat what you watch.
tiny.ag/xkpfj82n · ★★☆☆ Fair (490 ratings) · submitted 1997
Religion has done love a great service by making it a sin.
tiny.ag/koexwc3k · ★★☆☆ Fair (364 ratings) · submitted 1997
Man is able to do what he is unable to imagine. His head trails a wake through the galaxy of the absurd.
tiny.ag/vk93rps4 · ★★☆☆ Fair (1554 ratings) · submitted 1997
We must become the change we want to see.
tiny.ag/aoh5h6tb · ★★☆☆ Fair (1649 ratings) · submitted 1999
Everybody wants to save the earth; nobody wants to help Mom do the dishes.
P. J. O'Rourke, All the Trouble in the World, in Altruism and Cynicism and Work and Recreation
tiny.ag/5gcdbjbx · ★★☆☆ Fair (413 ratings) · submitted 1997
Genius is one per cent inspiration and ninety-nine per cent perspiration.
tiny.ag/iobj0muk · ★★☆☆ Fair (476 ratings) · submitted 1997
Cynicism is an unpleasant way of saying the truth.
tiny.ag/x2tnoops · ★★☆☆ Fair (810 ratings) · submitted 1997
The Puritans hated bear-baiting, not because it gave pain to the bear, but because it gave pleasure to the spectators.
Thomas Macaulay, History of England, I, in Vice and Virtue
tiny.ag/06lybgnu · ★★☆☆ Fair (313 ratings) · submitted 1998
Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Sufficient unto the day is its own troubles.
Jesus Christ, (Matthew 6:34), in Wisdom and Ignorance
tiny.ag/tcyzf8gu · ★★☆☆ Fair (1560 ratings) · submitted 1999 by David Knight
An expert is someone who is one page ahead of you in the manual.
tiny.ag/fed8pqej · ★★☆☆ Fair (1052 ratings) · submitted 1997 by David Epstein
Disorder increases with time because we measure time in the direction in which disorder increases.
tiny.ag/mmclufba · ★★☆☆ Fair (310 ratings) · submitted 1997
Less than fifteen percent of the people do any original thinking on any subject... The greatest torture in the world for most people is to think.
tiny.ag/zwylfryx · ★★☆☆ Fair (1391 ratings) · submitted 1997
tiny.ag/yio6tuyz · ★★☆☆ Fair (986 ratings) · submitted 1997
The face of a child can say it all, especially the mouth part of the face.
Jack Handey, Deep Thoughts, in Life and Death
tiny.ag/la65dtiv · ★★☆☆ Fair (1022 ratings) · submitted 1998
It was involuntary. They sank my boat.
John F. Kennedy, (comment when asked about his heroism), in War and Peace
tiny.ag/0spygbpd · ★★☆☆ Fair (535 ratings) · submitted 1997
Money may be the husk of many things, but not the kernel. It buys you food, but not appetite; medicine, but not health; acquaintances, but not friends; servants, but not loyalty; days of joy, but not peace or happiness.
tiny.ag/kiehwrll · ★★☆☆ Fair (673 ratings) · submitted 1997
We would often be sorry if our wishes were gratified.
tiny.ag/0adqbc8f · ★★☆☆ Fair (518 ratings) · submitted 1997
Everything should be made as simple as possible, but not simpler.
tiny.ag/f6aon4ji · ★★☆☆ Fair (1099 ratings) · submitted 1998
Never try to out-stubborn a cat.
Robert A. Heinlein, The Notebooks of Lazarus Long, in Success and Failure
tiny.ag/dkwhzql3 · ★★☆☆ Fair (400 ratings) · submitted 1997
Joy is not in things, it is in us.